3:57 p.m. Have had enough. Am fed up with coping with that stupid Cow.

3:58 p.m. Finally made up my mind to leave him. Hope he would learn a lesson. Am going to lose my job again, but that can't be helped. Godd-bye, everybody. I'm out-a here.

The End

Caterpillar

5:31 p.m. Wondering if anyone got tricked with yesterday's "Murmur" though don't have time to check if anyone has sent me messages. I was going to boast that Cow was such a small person getting so easily infuriated over small things such as my having not getting a receipt for 300 yen. However, it suddenly struck me the night before, that thinking everything was all right if it was all right with me, was blindly self-indulgent and selfish and had apologized him about my selfishness the next morning instead. So I'm neither leaving this place or losing my job.

5:40 p.m. In case some of you might have not noticed, it was April Fool's Day yesterday for your information.

The End

Caterpillar

10:43 a.m. Just remembered about an article I read in the papers last night, saying that Red Desire who was challenging for a top class race in Dubai, had lost because of her lonliness with Vodka unexpectedly leaving her alone for retirement caused by injury. It said in the article, that the Red Desire crews have done everything including pinning up a huge picture of Vodka on the wall of her stall, though the results revealed that her lonliness had been deeper than they'd thought. Ridiculous idea. Has the horse actually blurt it out on the reporter?

10:53 a.m. Also remembered that Takuya Kimura, former player in Japanese major baseball team the Yomiuri Giants, had fallen for subarachnoid hemorrhage. Was treated with life-saving measure by his teammates and taken to a hospital in Hiroshima by ambulance. Morning news has told he's still lying unconscious. Was a tough player. Wish he recovers.

The End

Caterpillar

2:18 p.m. Have spotted a horsetail on the side of the road in my neighborhood. This must be a chance to turn my memory of misery into a contentment of success, since have also seen one last spring though had forgotten the exact spot where it grew and was never able to see it again. Have double-checked the location so that it will not happen again this year. HAH! Shall have a sweet revenge this year.

4:43 p.m. Brewing a plot of having horsetail cooked in Miso Soup. Mmmm, taste of spring. It would be safer to carry out my horsetail-picking mission after dark, though. I definitely don't want to be caught by a neighbor when I'm bending over the sidewalk fence with scissors in one hand and a horsetail in the other.

The End

Caterpillar

2:04 p.m. Had a bad start today. First of all, I woke up late. I've been too absorbed in watching old episodes from "Ugly Betty" last night. Then, I had to fix my lunch in a rush as I was up late. When I was fixing my lunch in a zip, Obaba came out of her room since it had been raining from last night, and she was too bored with staying inside the house. She went on and on complaining about the weather, her being so bored with nothing to do, and how much she's annoyed with her daughter not paying her a visit for a long time. I was having a hard time not to let myself rage out of control. How can she expect me to keep her company while I'm trying to leave the house in less than fifteen minutes? Unfortunately, my actions must have spoken louder. The old lady got all cranky saying, "You can talk and still move your hands to do whatever you're doing, you know? I'm not asking for any magic," in an I-deserve-to-be-treated-more-nicely kind of tone. Great.

2:27 p.m. And on top of it all, have just noticed that I'd forgotten to pick that horsetail...

The End

Caterpillar

2:53 p.m. Cow has asked me the title of Japanese singer Akina Nakamori's hit song in which she performed an "ina bauer." Am afraid have the slightest idea, since haven't been interested in Japanese idols, singers, artists as long as can remember. It's only recently that have become aware that there are actually good Japanese singers, artists, bands such as; AI, Tortoise Matsumoto (vocalist of the Ulfuls, the band now having a break), Bump Of Chicken, Asian Kung-fu Generation, Chatmonchy, The Blue Hearts, just to name a few.

3:25 p.m. Wondering how Chatmonchy are accepted in the States. Think they were on the road touring there from April. Chatmonchy are a 3-piece girl's rock band creating unique music, with energetic, powerful performances on stages. I'm usually not interested in girl's bands, but these girls are an exception. You can find them at MySpace, FYI.

The End

Caterpillar

7:28 a.m. Had a bad start on Monday but today's was dreadful. Was awakened by the sound of TV news telling that Takuya Kimura, who formerly was a player at the Yomiuri Giants and had been hospitalized unconscious after having subarachnoid hemorrhage last Saturday, has passed away at the age of 37. Oh, geez.

10:54 a.m. He wasn't a power hitter, but a guy you can count on when the game was tough. There was a time when he was suddenly called as catcher (though he was an infielder) to replace Giants' injured regular catcher in a breath-taking game. He finished the inning in a brilliant one-two-three, making the stands roaring with excitement. I remember having goosebumps. At another time, he pinch-hit for the team when they had a tight game. He fouled off until the pitcher got frustrated and eventually gave him the chance to cash in. He was an all-round player able to play second baseman, shortstop, outfielder and catcher, also known as a switch hitter. Serious, decent and hard working, he was a kind of ball player that young followers can look up to though not a star. I'm terribly sorry to hear the news, but it may be a relief that the last few moments of his memory was that on the field. Guess God must have needed a good player for his team.

The End

Caterpillar

3:43 p.m. Cow went out to buy himself a carton of cigarettes. Cow and I both smoke despite recent better-for-you health trend.

3:49 p.m. Cow comes back. He came in the office door nervously looking around as if checking no one was watching. Seemed very fishy. As he came closer, he went skipping around in the office holding something like a box under his arm. "It's a Senryobako," said Cow, happily. A Senryobako is a chest that were used mainly during Edo Period (that's 400 years ago) to keep gold coins in it. What? What is he doing with a Senryobako? As he put it down on the desk I noticed it was a box of tissue paper resembling a Senryobako. So that's what you get for buying a carton of cigarettes at the shop where he buys. That's pretty nice, considering the fact that I usually get only lighters.

The End

Caterpillar

12:17 p.m. Cow seems to have found a movie of the former mentioned song of Akina Nakamori, and he started explaining to me that it was from a music show on TV, and the show host had been surprised to see her performance. "Don't know why but the show host's words &isquo;Karada-ga Yarashi’ was carved in my memory." What!? Did he really say that? On TV? ‘Karada-ga Yarashi’ literally means ‘having erotic body.’ Can't believe the show host had actually said that but if he did, no wonder Cow remembered what the guy had said for more than twenty years.

12:25 p.m. I checked Cow just in case. Did you mean to say ‘Karada-ga Yawarakai’ (meaning, to have a flexible body) instead of ‘Karada-ga Yarashi?’ Cow blushed and said, "Who said, ‘Yarashi’ ?" YOU did.

The End

Caterpillar

4:59 p.m. Someone I know wanted to learn how to sing an English song, so I decided to help him a bit. First, I asked him to sing the melody of the target song with ‘la-la-la.’ He started off well however, within less than a minute he somehow bolted out of tune. What? What happened? I tried desperately to make him understand the differences between notes however, he wandered off to a different world somewhere far away once we started singing again. Hmmm... This is serious. I thought he'd be able to do what he's asked, since had heard before that he's been taking piano lessons for a while, but I guess I was wrong.

5:12 p.m. Now I've got another problem to deal with, though it is challenging. How can I make this person recognize the melody and adjust his voice to it? Have never had much problem in that myself, so don't have the slightest idea how. Sure would like to know if anyone knows.

The End

Caterpillar

11:08 a.m. It's warm today. Almost too warm for this time of year that you can walk outside in short-sleeved T-shirts. Was walking toward the library entrance when I heard two yelling voices and saw at the same time, an old man with white hair grabbing the other old man by the back of his belt, like dragging an ill-kept German shepherd or something. The one held by his belt was yelling, "Let go of me, you idiot! Don't you touch me!" while the other bellowed, "Shhhutter rrup, you old fool!" Everyone seems come out when it gets warm and undignified old men, seemingly in their seventies though acting rather like they're seven-year-olds, don't seem to be an exception. I ignored the lunatics and went inside the library.

3:41 p.m. Apapane has won this season's Oukashou (Japanese 1,000 Guineas) sweeping all the other 17 fillies. Well, she didn't actually ‘sweep’ them in the sense that the jockey had to struggle when she came to around the middle of the home stretch, swerving her to the outside to avoid Eishin Returns who was getting in her way right in front of her, and then bumping into some other horse on her right. But regarding this together with the fact that she has been fighting the jockey to let her go all along the first half of the race, am sure she has a lead over her competitors. At least, for this distance.

The End

Caterpillar

3:13 p.m. It's raining. And it's much colder than yesterday. The temperature must have dropped nearly ten degrees. Guess I wouldn't have to see or hear any old men fighting today.

3:16 p.m. But I did see something weird on my way to the office today. As I was walking on the platform of the station, I spotted a dark bushy clump on the floor a few feet ahead. It was a bunch of... hair. What in the...? How could someone drop that much hair and go on without noticing? Or could it be a wig? I nearly stopped to stare at them for a while, but managed to pass by, finally reaching my conclusion that they were hair extensions... Good. I was beginning to get worried how miserable the owner of those hair might have looked without them.

The End

Caterpillar

8:32 a.m. Went for a walk this morning. It's become really warm again, so better watch out for ill-mannered old folks.

9:13 a.m. Inadvertently, my eyes fell upon the front yard of an apartment building on the side of the road, and discovered to my surprise, HORSETAILS! Growing in clusters! My brains went to work right away wondering how many bowls of horsetail Miso-soup could be made with them. There's no one around, the coast is clear, and the gate that led to the yard somehow was opened as if to say, "Welcome!" Fortunately, I was wearing a sweat shirt and sweat pants, so all the pedesterians would probably think I actually lived there, and was just pulling out weeds or something on a glorious morning. Everything was perfect. Except that there was one thing missing... courage. Hate to admit it, but I didn't have the guts to walk in through that gate, squat over the yard and pick those horsetails in someone elses property... In other words, I was too decent to barge into a stranger's front yard without their permission and pick horsetails, just because I wanted to eat them in Miso-soup to enjoy the spring season.

The End

Caterpillar

6:05 p.m. A boy who lives near our office dropped by. His father happened to know Cow from school, and he drops by from time to time. He's got himself an iPod (nano) last Christmas and lately have been enjoying dwonloading music into his iPod. As for me, am still using a portable CD player whenever I want to listen to my CDs but am considering buying iPod, since have been carrying the CD player in my jacket pocket through February and March however, it's getting warm these days. How am I going to carry that portable CD player if it gets too warm to wear a jacket?

6:12 p.m. Have asked the boy how many songs he's downloaded at which he answered, "About 800." Eight hundred? Well, that's quite a lot! "Think I've got about 1,000 on iTunes," he added. Wow. How much would that cost?

The End

Caterpillar

4:01 p.m. Cow is covering his nose and mouth with a can wearing an ecstatic look on his face. What? Has he gone out of his mind finally? What is he doing?

4:05 p.m. He noticed me staring at his face and came closer to put the can over my nose and mouth. Aaaargh! Aaaarrrgh! WHAT? WHAT IS HE DOOOOIIINNGG!?

4:07 p.m. Mmmm. After a moment of panic came a wonderful sweet smell of chocolates. The can was actually a gift from one of our clients, that used to contain chocolates in it.

4:10 p.m. I intended to keep the can over my nose, but Cow has taken it away from me... He's mean.

The End

Caterpillar

8:00 p.m. Am still in office. It's Friday, and am still in office at 8:00 p.m. Am very hungry, tired and panic-stricken since preparations for tomorrow are still left almost untouched... Arrrgh! Aaarrrghhh!

8:04 p.m. Cow has been fiddling through the books in the bookshelf and not helping me at all. He's rather bugging me pulling out this book and that, and he would not give me the can that smells of chocolate.

8:07 p.m. How dare he tells me to stop cpmplaining and finish this "Murmur" short! I'm doing my best despite my terrible condition. But just then, he brought me some chocolates from somewhere. O.K. I'll take that back.

The End

Caterpillar

9:15 a.m. Oh, no. Have overslept! Put on my clothes in a zip, grabbed my bag and left my house in less than 10 minutes. Ran to the station and barely made it for the train. Oh, geez. Will I make it for the meeting starting from 10:00 a.m.? Then, I remembered that I had set my alarm clock thirty minutes ahead, considering that I usually lag behind time. Good job, me!

10:54 a.m. Have arrived in time for meeting. Great. But now am depressed since was told that my client is calling off in a week. Doooooom.

12:17 p.m. Cheering my self up a bit, convincing myself that I am enjoying talking over the racing form with Cow, about the Satsuki-sho (Japanese 2,000 Guineas) coming up tomorrow. He's been ranting about the trainer of Rose Kingdom, because they hadn't entered the horse in the same distance as Satsuki-sho. Right, right, you're always right...

The End

Caterpillar

1:04 p.m. Leaving home for the off-track betting booth. Am supposed to meet Mr. N-jima there for Satsuki-sho (Japanese 2,000 Guineas).

2:50 p.m. Arrived at the usual 5th floor of WINS. My mind was still not settled whether to key Rose Kingdom or Eishin Apolon, when Mr. N-jima showed up drink-sodden. Apparently, he has been drinking with his clients till morning. Was about to scold him that he'd better start thinking about his age, but my jaws dropped instead as this white-haired old man boasted that he has won the trifecta in Kyoto Kinpai, February Stakes, Ouka-sho(Japanese 1,000 Guineas). What happened? This guy has piled up a mountain of loss with trifectas. What made him open his eyes? "Simple thing," he said. "Just increased the number of combinations."

3:43 p.m. There seems to be nothing that can stop Mr. N-jima when he's getting a boost. He's added another win with Satsuki-sho! Oh, God, now he's earned himself a double chance for HIS triple crown.

The End

Caterpillar

2:55 p.m. Feeling down. While Mr. N-jima has been winning back his money which he had deposited in JRA (Japan Racing Association) through these past several years, I've been losing and cashing him back, not to say that the amount of my bet is equivalent to his. Have lost three clients in the recent two months, with my earnings decreasing, don't have anyone to share or help me with my troubles and worries, my favorite TV dramas are all ending, and on top of it all, I'm getting nowhere though I think I AM trying hard. Where am I headed anyway?

3:14 p.m. Why, oh why, am I so... I don't know what I am. Oh, yeah, I was a caterpillar. A caterpillar crawling on the ground. Feels like I'll never become a butterfly. Or a moth...

3:18 p.m. Sing "Someday I'll Be Saturday Night" to myself to cheer up, though eventually found out that even my favorite Bon Jovi songs can't save me sometimes. The weather's fine today, but I'm feeling terrible. Perhaps I need a therapy or something.

The End

Caterpillar

4:04 p.m. Still feeling bad, but I've got to pick myself up because life goes on. There must be lots of people struggling in a much worse situation, such as the people hung up at Narita Airport because of the plane cancels due to volcano eruption in Iceland. Being forced to stay in a foreign country against one's will must be frustrating and worrying. I hope it gets better soon so that those people could get safely home.

4:37 p.m. Was wondering if there was anything I can do to help them when I remembered that I hadn't finished up my leftover work, which was supposed to be done by this morning.... oh, noooooo!

The End

Caterpillar

6:32 p.m. Had to make a call to my client to arrange the schedule for next week. But as I called her on her cell-phone, unfortunately I got the message service. Actually, I hate message service and answering machines. Reluctantly, I left a message for her to call me back. I wouldn't have left a message if it wasn't work-related.

6:34 p.m. I got a call-back and with a sigh of relief, thought everything was over however, it turned out that I had to make another call to a cell-phone to report what I've heard from my client. Geez, that's threatning...

6:43 p.m. Sure enough, it was the message service again that answered my call. I was still in the middle of talking when the phone suddenly hung up. Apparently, have run out of time... See? THAT'S WHY I HATE MESSAGE SERVICE!

The End

Caterpillar

4:10 p.m. Am veeerrry sleepy. Have been sleepy all day. Why? Perhaps because of the weather. The temprature has dropped more than fifteen degrees since yesterday. We've been experiencing wild ups and downs in temperature like a roller coaster for the past two months, and the weather man says it's all because of the rising temperature around the north pole. Guess that too, is probably related somehow to environmental disruption.

4:26 p.m. Feel a slight pain in my throat. Might have caught a cold. That could explain my sleepiness.

The End

Caterpillar

3:11 p.m. Have definitely caught cold. Throat swollen and sore, nose stuffed, head dizzy probably with fever. Feel terrible, but could not take the day off...

3:39 p.m. Wish someone would care for me.. at least a bit more. Sometimes I even wish I was seriously ill so that people around me would be more nice and caring.

The End

Caterpillar

1:51 p.m. Still am not feeling at all well. Have terribly stuffed nose and a blurred head. Cannot think of anything...

1:53 p.m. Cow has told me about how to make stuffed nose better. Apparently, he's seen it on TV some time ago. According to his vague recollection, stuffed nose are usually caused by expanding blood vessels. So you can make them better by temporarily limitting the blood flow with an appropriate pressure on your armpit. To be more specific for example, put your arm over the backrest of a chair so that your armpit rests on the top of the backrest. Make sure to set the armpit opposite to your stuffed nose at this time (set your right armpit if your left nose is stuffed). Then, gently let your weight rest on the top of the backrest, so that it presses your armpit moderately (not too hard becasue it will hurt). In about a minute or so, your nose would be clear with the blood vessels narrowing.

2:12 p.m. I tried it right away, not to mention. Wow, it does work!

2:18 p.m. But as formerly said, it's only temporary. You'll get back into your breathless stuffed nose crisis in a short time...

The End

Caterpillar

12:02 p.m. Got up late. Voice seems to have gone hoarse again. Can barely hear it myself when speaking. Last night I was shivering in my down jacket on my way home from the library which I dropped by to pick up a book I've reserved, fighting with feverish pain all over my body. Felt like cursing all the people around me since they're too busy enjoying whatever they want to do, that they never pay the slightest attention to notice me in such bad condition. Anyway, I'm sick. Who could blame me for sleeping till noon on my day-off? Glad it's a day-off after all.

2:04 p.m. Washed clothes and cooked own lunch dragging my heavy body. Must do it myself as usual no matter how bad I feel, because no one cares about me one bit. Caught up in a thought that no one would probably even notice me when I'm gone. That could be worse than having a sensational ending as what Bridget Jones fears she might end up in her diary, found three weeks after her death half eaten by an Alsatian.

5:23 p.m. Have found site where you can play piano online on a vitual keyboard. Pretty cool. Cheered me up a little.

The End

Caterpillar

10:03 a.m. Just saw on TV news that a fire engine has been stolen in Hyogo prefecture. Why would anyone steel a fire engine? The suspect is said to be male in his thirties, wearing a red T-shirt. Perhaps he wanted to know what it feels like to be a fire fighter.

3:25 p.m. Am recovering from cold but only gradually. Have tried my best not to use my voice yesterday, it's still hoarse and need a lot of effort to make my words distinguishable from breathing. However, I am feeling a little better not just because I've found an online virtual piano, but because have experienced a breakthrough during my guitar practice. Have been working on right hand exercises for proper picking using the snap of my wrist for about a month, and finally, yes, FINALLY became able to play the phrase which I haven't been able to play for years! I hadn't had time to practice with my guitar every day, so actually I've only been air-picking listening to CDs to and from work, but it worked! It is a narrow stream of hope, very narrow and faint, though it's definitely better than no hope at all. My next goal would be to ensure and maintain this skill and work on my left hand to be able to play more smoothly.

The End

Caterpillar

12:03 p.m. Started raining, but think it's warm compared to last week. Or is it becasue I'm recovering from cold and don't feel the chill? Anyway, it suddenly hit me that I might have a problem practicing picking on my way to and from work when it gets warmer. Up until now, have been air-picking in the pocket of my down jacket. But since I wouldn't be needing down jackets any more, a problem has come up about where to put my right hand without people seeing it air-picking, which certainly must seem weird to them. It may be embarassing if all the pedestrians took me as a wasted person with my hand shaking...

3:53 p.m. Think I'll brace myself since I need to practice in some way, and there's no chance I can squeeze out more time than I have now. Who cares if people think I'm an alchie or a junkie, or ...whatever. I shall not wimp out!

The End

Caterpillar

1:32 p.m. Cow has cooked spaghetti al filetto for lunch. What happened? Perhaps he might have read yesterday's "Murmur" and thought that he could be more cooperative. That was actually nice. Mmmm, Have had an enormous heap gratefully, and am full now. But such a case is so rare that I fear something bad could happen.

2:32 p.m. The Longman online dictionary site has returned 503 error. Tried a couple of times but in vain.

3:15 p.m. Have been trying more than five times but the site has been inaccessible. I managed to get to the top page once, but as I tapped in a word in their search box and pressed search button, they returned another error log... What is going on? Has the server went down? I've been using this online dictionary for some time and was counting on it to finish up my documents that ought to be finished by four o'clock, when all of a sudden I can't access it for some reason with most of the documents still undone and only forty-five minutes left to go. See, look what happened.

6:46 p.m. Eventually, found a different dictionary I could use however, couldn't finish the documents in time so I had to ask my client to wait while I finish them up. Ugh. But good thing is, tomorrow is a holiday. Hurrah!

The End

Caterpillar

3:24 p.m. Clear blue sky full of sunshine with fresh warm breeze, it feels refreshing today. Except for my nose, which is still suffering from the aftermath of cold. Have already spent a box of tissue paper to blow my nose constantly for three days, and now the skin on the top of my nose is miserably scraped... Pathetic sight for a grown adult.

3:33 p.m. Have you made your plans for the coming up Golden Week, by the way? I've been enjoying thinking about going shopping to buy iPod nano on Tuesday May 4th, since am going to WINS again for the Tenno-sho on Sunday the 2nd. As for the 3rd and 5th, I need to stay home to get some rest to restore faith and power for work, starting from 6th, Thursday. Have been pleasing myself with the idea of what I'm going to do with my first iPod, when I realized that I needed to download and install iTunes into my lap-top, and the threatening fact that my computer might not meet the conditions drove me to check out the requirements right away. My heart sank. There's no way I can run iTunes 9 on 256MB memory...

The End

Caterpillar

2:22 p.m. Considering using the high-spec desk-top at my office to install iTunes, though I'll have to bring my CDs every time I want to take in from my CDs. Hmmm, that's quite a bother. But guess I can manage if I bring them in small numbers like twos and threes. Wonder how long it will take to put all the music into the iPod from a mountain of my CDs...

2:41 p.m. Applying menthol ointment on to my nose. Not only that it's scraped, but now it's beginning to hurt because of too much friction of nose against tissue paper. Ouch. Considering changing my name from Caterpillar to Rudolph.

The End

Caterpillar